Pythia, the old Oracle of Delphi is no more. But there is another oracular namesake that gives you supposedly intelligent answers. Troubled with life as it is, I went looking for enlightenment. You can go there too, if you know where to search for, and importantly, the questions to ask. I'll be providing you with the address, but if you care to, go through the questions that I asked and the Oracle's philosophical replies:
What is the meaning of life?
The Oracle replied: To live in peace with oneself.
Why does the cigarette burn?
The Oracle replied: If you want to find the root cause, look in the mirror.
Why does the sky appear blue?
The Oracle replied: The causes of this incident are rooted deep inside the human mind.Where do I find peace?
The Oracle replied: In Afghanistan.
How to understand Derrida?
The Oracle replied: With unlimited money.
What is the most surprising thing about the universe?
The Oracle replied: Hate. This is sensitive information and you must keep it to yourself. Got it?
The most confusing question?
The Oracle replied: Hmm. You could ask me any question in the world and you come up with this?Understanding my limits, I was rather confused. So I asked:What would you like to ask?
The Oracle replied: "Why is there no cat food which tastes like mouse?”
This answer made me angry. The next question appeared instantaneously:
Why are you so stupid?
The Oracle replied: The cause is insignificant. You must focus on the consequences.
This made me suspicious. And like all sensible people walking the streets of Kolkata, I asked the most sensible question we ask strangers when they make us angry. And it left the Oracle, I believe, in eternal confusion.Tumi ki bangla bojho? (Do You understand Bengali?)
The Oracle replied: My Artificial Intelligence failed to parse what you said.
Ha! Guessed it at the beginning! But here's the link, if you're interested...
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